Tuesday, 27 September 2016


Memoirs from Boarding School
If you attended a boarding school you would agree with me that when it comes to the Dinning room there are different kinds of people.
The Voracious
In my school we call them " Vora " they eat fast and are always unsatisfied, I remember a girl let's call her Vera, Babe could eat anything the kitchen women threw on our table as food. The first day the school served us indomie was one of the worst day in my dinning room life, the indomie was overcooked and bland, obviously the kitchen women have never cooked indomie before and didn't know the litttle packs were the spices. The sight of the indomie was so unpalatable I refused to eat it, But Vera kept downing plates of indomie like it was made by a gourmet chef, I wasn't  surprised Vera was a voracious girl but five plates of that horrible dogfood was she even human, at the end on our way to the assembly ground she started throwing up heavily and we all laughed at her . The vora peeps where annoying sometimes begging for food and scraping scraps when people weren't looking , I personally caught Funke picking leftover moimoi from her seatmate when she thought no one was looking, What a Voracious babe probably you are eating meat and one babe would be like cut for my now, like she didn't eat hers.
The Tea drinkers
The group of people love cocoa beverage so much, they can drink two jugs full of tea. Some go as far as trading real food for tea, I won't lie, I love my food,but I didn't beg for food but I used to eat like the devil was on my heels.In our first year in secondary school all new comers  loved tea some more than other, I liked tea  but not to the extent that I would trade my goodies for tea,I remember a js3 student approaching me once and asking me if I would love to exchange my chicken, fishroll and popcorn for tea, the look I gave her would have turned her to a pillar of salt if it had that power, did she think I was dumb or stupid, no way , when some seniors are even begging us to drink their tea and I would now trade all my goodies for what I can get free? But some people were so in love with tea that they actually went through with the bargain , the tea always made us sleepy in class, as we got older in school we gradually started forming for the tea.
The Bargainers
We called trade by barter bargain in my school and it was the process of exchanging one commodity for another for instance, I didn't like biscuits so I would exchange my biscuits for garri with another person, I love my garri oh.
Nedu was like the craziest bargainer I knew, She would almost always have two plates of food and would say she bargained for it when I was in js2, Nedu was my refectory seat mate and she can bargain for Africa, One day our table was selected to serve pots of indomie and as a reward we got a very big pot of extra indomie, which we shared plus the the one we had on our table which made it two plates to each person, Nedu had bargained again and had four plates of indomie to herself, She didn't know what to do with it , Immediately the bell for food over went off and we where told to leave the dinning room, Nedu still had three plates of indomie and she started looking for who to bargain with, nobody agreed and the babe started crying, at the end people eat the indomie she suffered to bargain for , some people were stupid bargainers especially the js1 exchanging the fried rice and chicken for popcorn or chinchin , then there was this babe that loved beans die, she would bargain for beans and be getting plates of beans,one time she got a whole pot of beans.
The misers
This is the most annoying group , The way they eat food is so annoying you would just want to press their neck. A good example was Rufina, When food has been shared she would pretend to be asleep while we eat ours , then she would wake up slowly pick up her cutlery and start to pick at her food, she would load like ten grains of rice on her fork and chew very slowly, there were no boys in my boarding school, so I didn't know who she was forming for when the bell for food over goes off, she would start rushing the food like what is the point of misering the food  if you would rush it at the end, I won't lie people used to say I eat too fast, I wanted to start eating slowly so I can miser too, It's was really really stupid, you would get tired of the food, so I eat the way I eat, My mouth closed while I chew, and I put a healthy heap in my mouth not ten grains of rice in my mouth or chew and squeeze my face like I hate the food. Rufina would bend her head in one mournful matter and squeeze like she is eating manure instead of food.
Number 5
The always hungry
I think I fell into this group, I was a growing child with growing food needs, I was constantly hungry and the food to me wasn't enough you need to see my plate when am done eating no stress to wash it because I have practically almost licked it clean, some people were hungrier than me though, those ones would be squeezing their face after food, probably only one of their four stomachs is full
The Refectorians
The girls who were called to the noble profession of sharing food. They were the envy of school, everyone wanted to be a refectorians or wanted a friend who is a refectorian, I wanted to be a ref too, they get triple sometimes quadruple of what we got, we would be seeing seeing them leave the refectory with drawing books heaped with garri and rolls of milk on their shoulders , the foods in their plates would be high decorated with the biggest pieces of meat or fish. They had their own special table they were living the food life, being a refectorian was even better than being the head girl. 

There are other subgroups of people in the dinning room;

The ones that are always late

The ones always punished for no cup or cutlery

Those that always cheated while sharing the food

The ones that are friends or sisters to Refectorians and always get extra food

The table always punished for fighting because of food
The people that always gave their food to seniors to get favours.
The kitchen women's pet that always got extra food.
What group did you belong?

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